In my neighborhood, in my neighborhood

Do you really know the history of where you live? Here in Indiana, there was a big housing boom a while ago when all the farmers started selling their land. Very sad, actually. So it's safe to say that if you bought a home (anytime, really) it was built on former farm land.

There's a little plaque up towards the entrance of my subdivision that has always peaked my curiosity. Today I was feeling a bit down, and the weather was beautiful so I took a bike ride. Kicked my butt, really. At the top of the hill is the plaque, so I figured I would stop and read it.

The Koch family had an 86-acre farm that grew tomatoes, soy, corn, and raised hogs. They bought it from an established family in the area in the 1800s, and sold their goods to the local Polk Canning Co. Right after high school, Mr Koch was drafted to serve in the Army and was very proud of his military service.

In 1995, the owning Koch son passed away and the decision was made to sell the farm. In 1997, the builders began their work on the property adjoining Sherman Rd. The road was named for General Tecumeh Sherman, who served in the Civil War. Since the Koch family is very proud of their ancestry and military service, the builders wanted to carry that importance with the new housing. All the streets in Sherman Commons are named after places and battles of importance to the Civil War.

It is, in fact, the military names and battlefield locations that drew me to this place to begin with. I am very proud of the heritage of this land that I have now discovered. I mean, how cool is it that the builders wanted to carry on that importance and respect?

I wonder what all the housing additions would be like if they had plaques like this??

PET peeve... seriously

Ok, one of the things that has gotten to me most in life is people who get pets because they are cute. Forget that they need to know anything ab0ut what they are doing, the breed, or anything responsible. "It's a cute little ball of fluffy cuteness! I have to have it." I am a serious animal lover, and I don't joke about this at all.

Let's take a dog for instance. Probably the most popular pet in America. They sure are cute as puppies, or in a kennel, but are you prepared for a 12-16 year committment? That's how long they live. Did you know that? Did you know that each breed has different requirements, different needs and personalities? These are the types of things that need to be researched before someone gets a dog. Pugs are popular, expensive, and fashionable and cute. But did you know that they have respiratory problems? They snore really loudly through that cute little wrinkled snout and they are just loud breathers. That's just one example.

I have rescued more than a few dogs from people who buy them without being aware of what they are getting into. It's a very touchy subject with me. People get these cute little puppies and then they don't know what they are getting into. They can't handle it and they just get rid of their pets. That blows my mind, honestly. Pets have feelings and didn't ask to be adopted into an ignorant home. They need love and stability just like a child, and they are not disposable. I can't stand this!

I know a family who bought a cute little puppy from a pet store. They had him for a few months, couldn 't potty-train him, and were going to get rid of him. We took him in. That's how we got Oliver. I was home on bedrest, and it took me two weeks to house break him.

This same family now just bought a puppy Lab. Have you ever had a lab puppy? They are very high maintenance, high energy and absolutely HAVE to be trained in order to be the perfect family dog that everyone thinks they are. I had one that wasn't trained and darn well near neurotic, and I had to take care of another one when I was a nanny. I have seen them eat holes in walls, jump through second floor windows, and destroy $2k tables. For a family who can't even potty train and is living in a rental home, I am very worried about this puppy.

Why, oh why, do people do this? PETS ARE NOT DISPOSABLE!!

The Pied Piper

Have you ever been out somewhere and you notice that all the children seem to hang out with someone individual? Usually it's a teen or pre-teen that steps in and has all the fun, but as a parent (or even someone who doesn't have kids) you are quietly thankful that someone is entertaining the kids. Have you ever wondered how that particular person is designated? Is it a big sister or babysitter of someone? Does this person walk up to a child and says "Let's go play. Hey, and go get all your buddies too."?

The story of the Pied Piper is one that we all know from childhood. Pied actually means "wearing many colored patches", so it has nothing to do with the abduction of the children. But rather this poor man (we can assume) just plays his flute and the children all follow him everywhere he goes.

Children have always seemed to flock to people who have a certain essence about them. There are those of us who apparently exude this child-attracting "pheromone" of sorts and the little ones can tell who we are and just ask us to play. Or is it that we understand those children a bit more, and are there giving them that little extra bit of attention and compassion in a crowd of people? Maybe there is this little neon sign over our heads that only kids can see. Whatever the reason, I am one of those people and I have been forever.

When I was very young, I can recall going to my Great-Aunt Joyce's house on many occasions. One of these times, she was watching her grandson Grant. He was still in diapers and I believe I was in elementary school. We got along very well and just started playing. It was just a natural thing, like we knew eachother or something. I heard Aunt Joyce say later that Grant never takes to anyone like that, and that I must have some sort of gift with children. (I just found out yesterday that Grant is 21 and engaged to be married!)

I have always been the neighborhood babysitter, and the one that was passed around the church to watch kids. My parents trusted me with my younger siblings, and my babysitting neighbor would have me watch her kids if she had an appointment or something. I didn't really think about "liking" kids, it was just part of life. I had grown up that way.

As an adult, it took me a while to determine what it was that I really loved doing and that was after teaching high schoolers how to dance. I really felt alive when I taught, but then it took me a while to determine still that it was the younger children that I really had the connection with. When I was told after getting married that I wouldn't be able to have children, I filled the void by becoming a nanny to a baby. That's when it hit me... and that was also the same time frame I got pregnant. (Haha) I've been working with little ones in a daycare ever since.

But everywhere I go, the children find me.

Have you ever seen Stephen King's "Sleepwalkers"? Yeah, they're like the cats.

I go to funerals, there they are. I go to church, there they are. I go to family functions, they're there. Parties with strangers and their children? Yep, they find me there too. It might be the mommy-vibe, or the fact that I have very clingy children, that lets them know that I'm alright. I don't go seeking them out. I don't tell them to get their buddies. My kids don't even invite them over to me. They can just sense that I'm a "safe one", I guess.

I'm not complaining. I love kids. I love the kids I watch in my home, I love all my nieces and nephews, and I love all my friends' kids. I have a big heart.

I wonder how the Pied Piper felt.

Manicured coming of age

How old is old enough to take your daughter to the nail salon?

Oldest has been painting her nails herself since she was two. Middle has since she was about three. I'm a bit liberal when it comes to allowing my girls to experience certain things. I believe that if they are allowed to play with make-up and nail polish, and taught the proper dos and donts, they won't sneak around with it later on. I also think that it fosters a more open line of communication between the parent and child, where they would feel more comfortable asking questions about other things later on. I also dye their hair magenta in the summertime. Lol You're only a kid once, you know?

Last summer, it was brought to my attention that Oldest's friends were going to the nail salon with their moms. It was an odd concept, but I guess I can see it. If mom is going to go to the salon every two weeks to get her nails done, having the kids tag along every once in a while is ok. But I guess paying $10 a pop to get nails done on my girls, who never have their home manicures last a week because they play hard, seems a bit crazy. If I take one girl then I have to take the other, of course. Thank goodness Baby doesn't want hers done yet!

This summer it has started all over again. The girls are all going and getting their nails painted with little flowers and designs on them, and Oldest is dying for me to take her.

I could, but then I have to think about the other things. It IS just nail polish, but is it setting a tone for her that I will give in every time peer pressure hits? What's next, a nose ring? She's got a real level head on her, so I know that can talk to her about each thing on a case-by-case basis. It's Middle that I worry about. I'll have to take her along; it's only fair. She's the one who always cries 'unfair' over everything, and is ultra-dramatic and emotional. Am I setting the stage for her? Does she see her sister getting the same things that her friends have? Or am I just over-thinking again?

I suppose tomorrow I will go to a small little walmart salon and get their nails painted. As for the other stuff, I'm just gonna pray... I know I have a very long road ahead of me!

To pay, or not to pay?

There is a debate among parents: should you give your child an allowance? How much should you give them? When do you start to give them money? Do you use it as a reward?

There are many ways that parents have settled it in their own homes, whether or not they choose to "pay" their child. I personally feel that it is a good thing to teach a child to be fiscally responsible as soon as they are old enough to grasp the concept (usually around kindergarten to 1st grade).

My oldest gets money from the tooth fairy, whom she no longer believes in by the way. She is allowed to spend her money on whatever she wants, and it usually all goes to the ice cream truck. She hasn't lost any teeth in quite a while, so she has needed a way to earn money.

Over Spring Break, I told her that I would pay her $1 a day to help me out with the kids I watch. She loved that idea, and was fantastic at it! She has a natural gift with children and teaching, and I love to watch it blossom. Since school has been out, she has been begging me to let her read to the kids or do an art craft with them. Her friends are here at the house (I'm watching them) this week, so I haven't really let her do anything in all the chaos.

Today she wanted to buy ice cream for herself, sister, and friend but was out of money. (love the generosity!)I told her that I would again pay her to help me with the kids if she wanted a way to earn some money after her friends left next week. She was very excited about this. We also told her that it would be much more cost effective to buy a box of ice cream to share! :)

I know $1 isn't much, but it's what we have right now. Some people say that you shouldn't pay your child to do chores around the house that they should do as a part of the household anyway. This is a seperate job that she an choose to do.

How do you handle allowances at your house?

Student rights

I am so sick of hearing about the strip searching if a 13 year old honor student. Sure, it was embarrassing, but I have little pity for the girl. Let me tell you why.

Students have little rights, other than those of humans. They are not adults and do not automatically get the same rights given to them until they are 18. It's ok, we all had to go through the same thing! Nowadays, students have even less rights -- and it's all because of the changing times. Grown-ups can't just walk into an airport, and many times their jobs, without undergoing extensive security checks. Kids can't go to most schools without some of the same precautions since they are toting weapons and drugs. It's life, deal with it.

So a girl got strip-searched by a female school nurse. She didn't have to take off her underwear and bra; just shake them loose. Do I feel for her? Well, if she wasn't in a predicament where someone using drugs had pinne the blame on her for selling, she wouldn't be there. As a parent, I'm glad. So what if the drug was only ibuprofen, allegedly? Should it be lesser standards? No. I would much rather have some kid get embarrassed by shaking their underwear then to have that stash later pulled out and sold because it was hidden where they thought no one would look.

The girl was so embarassed that she had to change schools. Why? How did people find out - did they announce it on the PA? I'm sure she had to tell someone for it to get out. And to change schools? Seriously? Who of us hasn't been humiliated in school?? It's part of awkward adolescence to be ridiculed by toe friends at one point or another, isn't it? You ride it out; kids will forget. Or you talk about it on the news.... Yeah, that's a way to hide it.
Get over it and move on. People have many things worse than that happen to them everyday.

Soak in the Rain

One day it was storming while we were in Meijer. When we came outside, Oldest, her friend, and Dad with Baby were all trying to hurry in from the rain that was moderately falling. I looked back, and there was Middle: standing with her arms held out, looking up, walking slow and smiling with the most beautiful look of wonder on her face. It was if she was trying to soak every drop in.

It was an amazing moment, and one I was jealous of.

I used to play in the rain as a child and I would sit on the front porch steps to watch thunderstorms rage. I still love to race out and splash in the puddles before they drain away after a downpour. It was just one of those moments were I saw myself in Middle, and it brought me back to the sweet innocence of childhood.